ARGH.

My facebook and yahoo accounts have been hacked twice in the past two weeks. Someone hacks into it and changes my password. SO I probably will be deleting my facebook account and yahoo account soon after I get hold of it..

Diu 2.0 - Week One

Okay, honestly, I did use my phone. To call my mum up. I mean come on! It isn't some kind  of punishment, is it? Plus my mum refused to call on my roommates' phones. She didn't want to inconvenience them because I wanted to do this crazy experiment!

But otherwise, my phone was switched off. Everyone is irritated (hehehe). They can't contact me or tell me stuff if it is urgent. Of course I do get the urge to text. I felt like a part of me was missing.With great restraint on my part, I did not dare to switch on my phone. Honestly, if my phone wasn't switched off, I really wouldn't have manged to not text.

I am really happy to say this-I have been reading! Reading!! Newspapers, Magazines, Novels! Now if I have to tell someone something, I have to go upto them and then say it. If I was unsure of how to phrase something, or if they were too far away, I wouldn't take the trouble. I would text them.Or call. So, that has been good.

Email! Letters! Diary! I've been writing! I like writing. Putting my thoughts down on paper.They make me have opinions. They sort things out in my head. They make life simple.

I've been HAPPY!! =)

My experiments with the phone

Like Gandhiji experimented with the truth, I, divinediu will experiment with the phone.

I have two cell phones and three sim cards. I have sent upto 300 text messages a day. Not forwards. But text messages. I usually carry both my phones everywhere. I am simply unable to switch off my phone for no reason. My phone is an extension of my arm and low battery or weak signals alter my mood quite negatively.

I will not use a phone for a month. (Except on weekends when I'm home.) The sms rani is phoneless now.

I expect to experience withdrawal symptoms, mood swings and a lot more free time and sleep time. In my free time, I will read, exercise, meet up with people, introspect, pray, paint, sing, dance, show love and write.

I can be happy without a phone, can't  I?

(I got this photo from here)

I am pretty sure I'm going to miss getting good morning and good night texts the most.

Things to say during sex

courtesy:http://www.joeydevilla.com/wordpress/wp-content/uploads/2008/08/things_to_say_during_sex.gif

O panipuri wala! Kahan ho tum?

I was nine. It was the first time I had been to the Juhu beach, Mumbai. I was with with my dad. We had gone to the Nehru Planetarium before that (I was awake for fifteen minutes of the show) and also saw Amitabh Bachchan's gate.

We walked on the sea shore and I looked around, fascinated at the new sights and sounds around me. I saw a couple of people gathered around a man. He was putting little round things into cups that each of them held. They looked like they were in a hurry to eat. And they looked happy.

He handed me was a little leafy cup. He put my paani puri in it. I was examining how to eat it when I noticed that the water was leaking from the puri into the cup and bhaiya already had the next one ready in his hand. So I put the whole puri in my mouth and took in the mix of flavour and texture. Though I couldn't finish even one plate at the time, though I threw up shortly after (in front of a police station, I remember), I was in love.

I love the pudina flavoured gol(because the puris are round) guppa(the way you eat the puri) with extra chilli! I love the sweet ones too. Apparently some vendors put vodka - mostly in private parties. I wonder how that tastes! I also like the special dry puri they give after a round of the paani filled ones!

When I go back from work, there are paani puri vendors round every corner! I have succumbed to temptation each time. I have no regrets yet! =D

I'm running away

Holidays are on right now. When I have free time, I watch movies. I listen to music. I delete texts on my phone. I categorize stuff on my laptop. I sleep for hours on end. I call someone up. I see how much money I've been spending.

But I can't seem to sit and think. I used to do that earlier. Analyse why certain things are happening. Why I react in a particular way. How things have changed. How I can become a better person. But now, I avoid it. Maybe I know it is going to disappoint. Maybe I've lost hope. I'm running away.

Die Twitter Die!

(The title is not meant to offend. It is dramatic. I have many friends who love it so much, I really wouldn't want to kill the birdie.)

I thought if I was on Twitter for long enough, would grow on me. I hated twitter even before I started using it. But after Crazy Psycho Blogger persuaded me to try, I did. I still don't love it. I don't get it. Really.

I don't want to tell my followers every single thought. I don't want to read other peoples' teeny tiny details too. The only thing I used to read on twitter was #WTF.

And I'm getting a little sick of the whole social networking thing. Just a little. I guess it is a phase. I can see a time coming when I go online and NOT check facebook.

My current worry is textaphrenia.

What is textaphrenia?

Textaphrenia is thinking a message had arrived when it hadn't, while textiety is the anxious feeling of not receiving or sending text messages.

"With textaphrenia and textiety there's a feeling no one loves me, no one's contacted me," the Daily Telegraph quoted a girl as saying.

When I am with a couple of friends, it's fine. I don't check my phone at all. But if I'm alone, I check for texts every 5 minutes (because my phone is always on silent, non vibration). I know it is sickening.

I'm SO addicted. Sigh. Chocolate was easier to give up!! Not a good sign at all. I feel I'm calling cancer when I talk on the phone for hours.

You want to know what is worse?

I have two phones.

Which is better?

What do you think is better? Getting adjusted to what you have...what you're working on..being content and satisfied with things in general OR being fussy...wanting more and not sticking with anything you're not happy about?

You'll tell me to strike a balance. But what if I can't?

A roach ate my ipod earphone wire

Yeah, it did. ARGH. I used it at 10pm and when I see at 6 am, all bitten. So pissing off!

I reread a couple of my previous blog posts. Decided to write again. See, Sushie..you didn't have to regret not commenting on my posts earlier because this made me post!

Holidays have begun. I think did pretty well this semester. Maybe because I liked my subjects. Maybe because I wanted to. Maybe because I didn't have much of a choice. The marks haven't come out yet. But they don't really matter. I'm happy with how I've worked.

But I do want to get more involved in college. Organize. Participate. I've volunteered for orientation. I hope I get selected. So I need to organize, prioritize and plan to fit more stuff into my schedule.

A LOT of things have happened since January 15th- the last time I blogged. A whole semester has gone by. (A whole semester without eating in the canteen BTW)

I've lost friends. Luckily for me, I've got them back. When a fight with Someone affects you much more than a fight with anyone, you realize that Someone is special. And you need Someone. Not for anything specific, just to be around. That happened to me. I tried everything. I tried pretending things were okay. I tried convincing myself that Someone wasn't a good person. I tried ignoring Someone. Nothing worked. Who was I fooling? It always ended the same way- with me in tears. Then...I got a chance. A brilliant chance. To make everything better. And I grabbed it. But just before me, Someone grabbed it. It made all the difference. To know that the feeling was mutual. In the end, everything did become better.

And some things haven't changed.

I still don't know how to put eyeliner.

I still love black nailpolish.

And I am still trying to knock off a couple of pounds.

Ellipse with a slice of cake

Thankyou NesQuarx!! =D Thankyou Vigneshwar. And sorry to Vigneshwar and Narendra.

Thanks to everyone who care for me. Wishing me on my birthday will make me happy, of course it will. A poem or a card or a gift (or all the three) will make me happy, yes. But thankyou for caring.

I love this process of growing up. It gives me more confidence. At the same time, it scares me. Looking at different perspectives on things..choosing the better of two evils. It hurts like hell sometimes. I wish everything was just happy and great and okay. But like would not be challenging then.

I did a LOT of screaming on my birthday. The doorbell rang and my three idiots are out, standing with a cake. They didn't know where I lived even! That was an AWESOME moment I had recently! Just AWESOME!!

Ellipse recently tried to commit suicide. Family problems. Work pressures. Ellipse is one of the smartest men alive. And I'm not exaggerating on that one. Which just goes to show how important family is. You need to have some sort of support system. I really feel bad for Ellipse. I can't even imagine what he was going through to take such a drastic step. We all consider suicide. All of us do. Escapism. It is the easiest way out. But it takes a LOT of guts to go through with it. What if it doesn't happen- like it happened to Ellipse? What if you don't die? You have another problem to worry about. You'll have to live with the humiliation. Maybe at that stage, you won't really care about what others think. I don't know. It just sends a chill down my spine.

ITS MY BIRTHDAYYYAYYYAYYAYYY

That's the way ahan ahan I like it!! =D

............and I slept through twelve o clock.

6:30 am. 46 missed calls, 30 new messages. Hehehe.... That initially WAS the plan...but I didn't really think I'd be fast asleep at twelve. Thanks everyone!!

Happy anniversary Narendra! You just HAD to start blogging on my birthday, didn't you? =D

Karma Rocks. Atleast right now it does. =D

Everybody-you know how much you all mean to me... simply because keep telling each one of you. hehehe

I hope this is a good year for me. Someone told me it's a lucky year for the Capricons. ;)

lalalalalalalalalala

I'm not as psyched as I used to be. But its nice.

Ohohohoh...I'm 19 now btw.

If you're reading this post, WISH ME!!!

I'll end with what Narendra wrote for.................... ME!!!!

Thankyou so much for my gift. I lub it. Please talk to me soon.

When words filled mute corners

And rhythms played harps,

Not the other way round…

When chimes moved no muscle

So that they didn’t miss what you say

When giggles crossed books and shelves

And heaviness of evenings felt so light

~

O give me lines to write

O give me lives to live

~

While you fortified your tears

And counted mine as they trickled down

When laughter broke out of those same forts

And roared amid death silence

Dry leaves began falling from above

Just to have a closer look at you

When giggles crossed temples and bells

Loudness of gongs felt so faint

~

O give me lines to write

O give me lives to live

~

But rhythms will all soon perish

Sounds and words will finish

Giggles with be washed by times and space

And then in some different clothes

I shall come here again

I know you would be here too

Waiting to be found, waiting to be ‘you’

O give no lines to write

O give me more lives to live

~

Then perhaps I would find for you,

‘Known to many, seen by few’

I’ll search for you in the dog eared books.

Running my fingers across the dust shelves

Hitting gongs and temple bells

‘Seen by many, known to few’

In my dry leaf, I find you

Like a fresh pearl…’divine dew’

~

I don’t have to say anything more…this poem is for you diu (look even this line rhymes…You diu…diu you…yoo hoo…do the dew… )! Happy birthday to you!